Tuesday, June 09, 2009

The Spirit Was Willing, but the Flesh Knew Better

Boy, did I have a bright idea today. Sure, my legs were a little sore from yesterday, but not too bad. (Despite predictions, I was not infirmed.) I decided that I should go on my scheduled run today and, really, that should help with healing, right? Nevermind that today's scheduled run is my first attempt at a harder interval run (sub lactate threshold, for those remotely interested). I'll be fine, right? Right.

Add to that the fact that I overdressed. Fifty-eight degrees on a sunny day does not call for a long-sleeve top and knickers. What was I thinking?

So, here I will narrate the conversation between the spirit (willing) and the flesh (worn-out).


Scene: A few yards into the run.

Flesh: Um, you're kidding, right?

Spirit: No. This'll be great! Just what the ol' legs need!

You think so? And what the heck is this? You call this a warm-up?

Um, yeah. The warm-up needs some adjusting with the new HR zones. Don't worry, we'll be fine. Just take it easy until the legs loosen up.

Loosen up? You think it's going to get better than this? If you haven't noticed, we're in pain here.

I noticed. I'm waiting for that to go away. Hey, listen to that beeping. Time to run our first work interval! It's faster than we're used to going, eh?

Ow. OK, it's a fairly short interval. We can work with this. But not for long.

Ah, that's the spirit. Wow, this is a bit harder than our previous runs, eh? But that's great! This will be a great way to improve even faster.

Um, yeah. Whatever. Is the six minutes up yet?

Just... about... now. Whew! OK, now we rest for a minute and a half. This time we'll walk, but eventually we should be doing slow jogs for our rest intervals. Wow, that went fast, didn't it? OK, here we go!

Wait, what? Again?!? You've lost your bloody mind, you know that? Once was enough, but twice?!?

Watch the attitude, flesh. You just do as you're told, and we'll fight through this together. We'll be fine. We did the first interval, we're going to do the second, and then we're at the halfway point.

OK, now I'm done listening to you. I'll let you finish this one, but after that, we're through.

Oh, come on. Where's your spirit? Oh, yeah, that's me. Um... Where's your determination? If we want to get better, we have to work hard. Whew. Is it hot out here, or is it just me?

Yes, it's hot. That's why we're dripping wet. Small clue. Here's another clue.

Ow! That hurts!

Yeah. That's my clue that we're done running. D.O.N.E. Done.

OK, fine. We'll walk the third interval and get back at it for the fourth.

[snicker]

What was that?

Um, nothing. Carry on.

OK, hear that beep? That's our signal! Let's finish strong!

I finished quite some time ago.

Please?

No. Listen, you're lucky I'm letting you make it home without calling for help. And just so you remember who's really in charge here, we're going to walk like a 95-year-old woman for the rest of the day. We're going to have to use the sink and bathtub to support ourselves as we get on and off the "potty". Seriously. We need to rest these legs. You may know determination, spirit, but I know toast. And that's what these legs are: crispy, burnt toast.

True story.