No Threat of Deprivation Here...

Yeah. So I got that whole deprivation thing off my chest. And now...?

First off, I'm finally healthy again. It's been a slow climb up, but I think that - today - I can finally say that I'm 100%. Yesterday might have been 99.5%, but the weekend certainly was not there. But I got out there and ran, swam, and weight trained. Whew.

And then I got back inside and ate. And ate. And ate.

Am I really that hungry? I'm pretty sure the answer is no. So what's going on?

OK, so I let myself eat at or around maintenance while I was sick. I mean, come on. Should one really throw a caloric deficit on top of everything else when one is suffering from a virus? I say, no reason to kick a body while it's down.

Well, the body's back up. But so is, apparently, my appetite. Or my belly. Or... something.

Fear not, there's nothing to be ashamed of. Although I hit 2855 calories today, Fitday assures me that I still have achieved a caloric restriction of 31 calories today. So there, take that, healthy but "bingey" eating! (HBBE, for short.) No fat blasting today, but we're not building up reserves, either.

Let's reflect, shall we?

• Breakfast: great. Too little fat, though. About 450 calories. Had a nice savory oatmeal/egg/vegetarian "sausage" fritatta-type dish and a green smoothie.
• Morning snack: good. Still low in fat, but OK everywhere else. About 190 calories. Another green smoothie. My morning snacks are a bit low since switching to smoothies. Maybe I should add some nuts here...
• Lunch: good. I made up for some fat here (the ranch dressing always does it), but it was about 410 calories (42% fat). Leftover dinner, salad, half an orange.
• Afternoon snack: Here's where the HBBE started. I landed at 55% fat for the "meal" and very little protein. It started with a quesadilla, almonds, and a ZBar. Finished and should have been more than satisfied. Nope. The True North almond clusters called to me. Um, yeah, let's top off all that fat and carbs with... more fat and carbs! Anyway, they called and I answered. More than once. Still, the HBBE ended with under 850 calories. Certainly not good and not balanced, but let's reflect once again on my past history with Jack in the Box. Yes, things could definitely have been worse. Let's move on.
• Um... second snack? Went to therapy, swam, came home. The almond clusters called to me once more, so I had to put them all in my belly so they'd shut up. Clearly, we will think twice about allowing almond clusters into the house again. Damage: 340 more calories, mostly fat with a little carb/protein.

I can list the rest, but I think it's pretty inconsequential right now. Here are the lessons I'm taking from this.

One: I need to consider planning on cooking dinner right after arriving home. The too-big, unbalanced afternoon snack has occurred on more than one occasion. Sure, it's a little early to have dinner around 3:30 to 4:30, but it makes more sense to continue something that clearly isn't working.

Two: I need to hard boil some eggs and get some more easy-to-grab protein sources stocked up. I suspect that if I had gnoshed on some good proteins, this wouldn't have spiraled like it did.

Three: I need to figure out why I'm willing to eat when I'm not really hungry. Sure, no big damage done, but some part of me is trying to tell me something. I need to figure out how to listen so I can deal with it.

OK, I think I've set up some food for thought. Tomorrow's a fresh day. Chicken thighs are already defrosted and ready to go for tomorrow's... um... Linner? Dunch? Meal#4? Nevermind; I'll figure that out later. One thing at a time.